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A church sister confided in me and said she has a boyfriend who is not christian and they are having sex and she does not believe it is wrong, because she does not believe that you have to be married by a pastor etc to be married. (referred to Adam and Eve) What can I really show or tell her??

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adam and eve didn't need a pastor since God Himself officiated. every culture has its norms governing its various institutions, incl. the family. in the postmodern west, some of the dimensions are; legal, emotional, social, spiritual, economic, intellectual and then physical [sex]. research abounds that informs us that premarital sex can only be destructive. the prince of this world continues to deceive some into thinking that they can have some private interpretations of the scripture. in addition, they are unequally yoked. a 'biblically sanctioned marriage' has always had at least two components; a] some type of ceremony and b] at least two witnesses to testify to its official and proper commencement
Though marriage can be contracted between a man and woman outside the church but it still has to be documented. Having sex with a man might not signify that you are married, the Bible is very much against it, so it is required for any man and woman who wants to be or leave together for life to get a document that states their status.

Have you looked around to see the events overtaking the christian fold today? even those who are legally married by the court and church get seperated how much more those who believe that sex is all it takes to be with a man or woman.

My Sister in the Lord, pray enerstly for God's direction in this issue and He will put you through. May God bless you as you do this.
Hey ,

I think that if she is serious about Christ she will think it is wrong. God said sex is wrong out of marriage , an a marriage has to be blessed by God . Essentially , we use pastors to facilitate such a union . If this were not so then there would be no distinction between married persons an those living in a common law union . Further , everything God created was good, so Adam an eve was in a sense married and blessed by God , God gave Eve to Adam much like women are given to men in holy matrimony today .
This example came to my mind as I read this. Think about the women at that well. Jesus told her that she had already had 5 husbands and that the man she was currently with was not her husband. So if sex is the only thing that makes you married then why was she not married to this 6th man? Jesus himself made that distinction. We have every reason to believe that she was having sex with this 6th man but he was NOT her husband. That tells me that there is more to being married in God's eyes than simply having sex with someone. This is only one of many examples in the bible that talk about sex outside of marriage. I hope this is helpful.
There is a flaw in the reasoning of this woman.
- She has a relationship with a non-christian. The bible clearly states: be ye not unequally yoked.
- She believes that she doesn't need a pastor to be married.
- She believes that she is married to this guy and can engage in sex.
Maybe you don't need a pastor to be married (people who get married without a pastor, usually don't believe that they need Godsblessing for such an important decision in their lifes), but you will need the acknowledgement of your government or society to regard this relationship as a marriage. Marriage is a public event, that is recognized by the state. And as christians we should obey the government as long as this doesn't contradicts the law of God.
Jesus performed His first miracle at a wedding. By doing so He confirmed an institution that was established by Him.
This sister should wonder where Jesus was when she started this relationship and started having sex outside of marriage.
i feel that in this sicomstances that its wrong due for the purpose as that it perfectly illustrated in ephians 5 read it and it clearly shows that what god as given us a gift to produced life is ssomething that bare a responabilty to make sure that we use this gift for the rright purpose
Time of ignorance exists, but now we know the good and the bad. Let's do what is pleasing to God.
Does this young woman believe that she is married? Does he believe that he is married to her? Is her a 5 percenter?

Here are some texts that might help...

1 Corinthians 7: 8, 9, 36 - I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will, he sinneth not: let them marry.

Matthew 5:31 - It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: I am thinking that if the husband would have to write a contract to release his wife from the marriage, then there was probably a contract to make the marriage official in the first place

The Bible speaks over and over again about being given into marriage (you can look this up in a Bible word search). I have not really studied the evolution of marriage traditions in Judeo-Christian cultures. But something about this being "given into marriage" makes me think about the process of becoming married.
I find your story hilarious...sure you not projecting. Adam and Eve were married by God the account of the creation of Adam and Even in Genesis. When Adam spoke to bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh those were actually marriage vows. Bear in mind Adam named the animals and plants and these were insync with God's design and plan. So the act of marriage which he pronounced was God's design.

The sabbath and marriage were created at CREATION. She does not have to be married by a Pastor....there are civil marriages...Christ first miracle was at a wedding...turning water into he was demonstrating that marriage ceremony should be done. HEY even GAYs want to get married.

It seems your friend has a bigger is not a good sign when one seeks to ratinalize sin. That is presumption.
hey waz up , i liked ur comment
I hope you do appreciate you dont have to be married by a pastor before your marriage become acceptable to God but then it should be recognise one b4 you engage in sexual activities. hope this might help
Brother Matthew I like your comment also with the Bible text that you quote. Thank you for that.

Bless you


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