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Matthew 19:9 "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery:and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery."

 

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I just want to share this with you this particular reading about the question you have raised. This was authored by David J. Stewart. I appreciate the way he presented this issue. I am sorry if this is very long or a lengthy post, you might get bored. But if you will take time reading it, you would say that the time you've spent to it is worth giving attention for.

I hope this helps answer to your question.

Divorce is a Sin!

"Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." —Matthew 19:6

Divorce is a sin! Perhaps you may think that marriage is the "old fashioned" way. If that is your thought on marriage, then let me also say that marriage is the "right way" as well. It does not matter what has changed over time, marriage will always be the right way within the sacred boundaries of God's law. Marriage is right between a man and a woman!

There is no perfect marriage. There are no perfect families. Every marriage hits some potholes in the road, and for some, an occasional open manhole cover. It is unrealistic to believe that you can live with another human being for any length of time without having relationship problems. Sadly, feminism has taught women these days to become intolerant toward their husbands. The Bible teaches one to be kind, tenderhearted and forgiving (Ephesians 4:32).

A marriage should be based upon unconditional love for one another. Worldly so-called "love" is synthetic, demanding, selfish and conditional. But God's love is unconditional. One ought to love their spouse, not because of who they are; but rather, because of who you are. God unconditionally loves us because of Who He is. Amen. This is why we read in Romans 5:8, "But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."

Unfortunately, many marriages today are based upon economics, a hasty decision or an unexpected pregnancy. If you are in such a marriage, it is still a legitimate marriage in the eyes of God. Perhaps you married for the wrong reasons, many people do. That is ok, you just make the best of your marriage and don't let other people interfere. Two wrongs never equal a right. Wrong is wrong! If you feel you married the wrong person, then you need to ask God to humble you. Anyone can live with anybody if they can learn to be a nobody. This whole idea of finding the perfect mate is an illusion. Remember, Romans 3:23 declares, "For all have sinned..." I don't care who you marry, they're a sinner too. We all have faults, and commit sins. Leaving one spouse for another will just bring more problems. If you feel that you need to separate for a time due to problems in your marriage, then do so; but never consider a divorce. Divorce is quitting!

No Scriptural Grounds for Divorce!

In Mark 10:9 Jesus states, "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." No one is to ever break apart a marriage. I wouldn't want to be a judge who grants divorces. I wouldn't want to be the lawmaker who allows for all sorts of unscriptural grounds for divorce. And by the way, there are NO SCRIPTURAL GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE. In Matthew 5:32, Jesus said, "But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." Taken by itself, this Scripture can be interpreted numerous ways. However, Jesus plainly stated in Matthew 19:8 that God never permits divorce, and that divorce is only caused by a hard heart, "He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so." Jesus clearly taught forgiveness in Matthew 18:22, not 7-times, but 70 times 7. Divorce is rooted in self-righteousness and an unwillingness to forgive.

To divorce one's spouse is a sin. If committing adultery is grounds for divorce, then Matthew 5:28 gives every wife Biblical grounds to divorce, because EVERY man has lusted.

Let me also say, If Jesus was willing to be despised and rejected of men, beaten to a pulp, mistreated, scorned, assaulted, spit upon, and crucified to death ... FOR US ... then we should follow Christ's example. A husband who loves his wife will not quit. Please understand that I am not condoning abuse, not at all. I'm simply saying that divorce is not the Biblical solution to one's marriage problems. You made a promise to God and your spouse on your wedding day.

Jesus was willing to die for you and me. So why are professed "Christians" so quick to divorce their spouse? I don't recall any disclaimer in the marriage vows that gives a spouse the right to divorce under ANY circumstances. What ever happened to "'Til death do us part?" I'm not hesitant to inform you that "irreconcilable differences" is NOT found in the Bible as grounds for a divorce. There are NO Biblical grounds for divorce!!!

Adam and Eve were doing fine until the serpent came along. Eve listened to a snake and took the bad advice. She ate of the forbidden fruit and destroyed her family's happiness. May I say, watch out for the snakes in your life. The BeeGees, although a worldly group, had it right in their song, HOW DEEP IS YOUR LOVE... "We're living in a world of fools, breaking us down, when they all should let us be, we belong to you and me." Yet, professed Christians are sinfully crying out divorce, divorce, divorce!

Divorce is a sin for a few reasons:

1. Because you are breaking your marriage vows..."'til death do us part!" When you say your wedding vows, you are making a lifetime commitment. I don't care if you get married at city hall or a church, God still holds you accountable for your wedding vows. A promise is a promise!

2. Because God said not to divorce! "Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." (Matthew 19:6)

3. Because divorce is quitting! (1st Corinthians 7:10-11)

4. Because divorce is unwillingness to forgive! "Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven." (Matthew 18:21-22)

God hates divorce! It is only because of sinful pride and selfishness that people end up divorced in the first place. It is so typical to hear a divorced wife, or husband, talking about how much they gave but never received anything in return. Listen friend, marriage is not a 50/50 deal as most people think. Marriage is a 100% deal. We are supposed to give 100% to our spouse, even if they only return 10%. But you say, "That's not fair!" You're right ... life's not fair! We are a spoiled bunch in America!

It's sickening to know that over 50% of all marriages in America are now ending in divorce. In California it's 75.54%! It's our pride! Anything can be justified. The truth is that people don't do what they do for any particular reason, they do what they want to do and then look for reasons to justify it.

God created Adam, and then gave him a job to do. However, God created Eve with one sole purpose—Adam! We read in 1st Peter 3:6 that Abraham's wife, Sara, called him "lord" (sir) and obeyed Abraham. This is so rare nowadays.

We are not to give up on our spouse. God NEVER gives up on us... Hebrews 13:5... NEVER! If we are to be Christ-like, then we must stand faithful by our mate... "for better, for worse." You made a vow on your wedding day. People nowadays are quick to file for divorce. It is apostasy.

Wouldn't it be nice if every marriage could always be only "for better." Not really. If you never went through tough times together with your spouse, then you would never grow together.

"And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter. And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery." —Mark 1:1-12

Carefully notice that Jesus DIDN'T answer, "yes" to their question. Clearly, divorce is not lawful. Jesus directed them to the law of Moses. The Pharisees stated that Moses allowed divorce. Jesus COUNTERS their excuse by telling them that Moses reluctantly permitted divorce, only allowing it because of the wicked HARDNESS of their hearts. It couldn't be any clearer that Jesus was completely against divorce. So in answer to the Pharisee's question, of whether divorce is "lawful" or not, we have already made 3 observations:

1. Jesus DIDN'T permit divorce.
2. Moses DIDN'T want to permit divorce either, but the people gave him no choice.
3. Divorce only happens because of people's rebellion against God.

Don't Divorce, Please!

God is willing to forgive us an infinite number of times. Surely we can learn to forgive each other. Don't allow the pressures of this crazy world destroy your marriage. Set some priorities. Turn off the phone. Tell your friends your going to be busy spending time with your family. Love your spouse. Go places together. Forget the overtime. Don't work midnight shift. Go to the park together. Do some different things.

Don't be stupid like so many people, by throwing away your marriage. I'd hate to think you simply don't care anymore. If that's you, then you need to get right with God! If your job is stressing you out, then take a break; but don't divorce. Go on Family Medical Leave (FMLA) for stress. Go to your doctor and tell him your stressed out. Hand him the FMLA form. You're protected by congress, and you can't get fired. You can take 90-days off from work. If you can't afford to miss work, then use "intermittent FMLA," so you can miss work whenever you need to. Take a break. I sincerely believe many marriages are failing because of the monotony and stress of the workplace, combined with all of life's other problems. The economy is deteriorating, good jobs are becoming scarce, insurance premiums are skyrocketing, insurance coverage is decreasing, spending power is declining, perversion is all around us, feminism and homosexuality are corrupting society, our government is run amuck, society is becoming very cold and paranoid—it all amounts to increased tension on American families (Christian included).

Employees mean absolutely nothing to companies these days. These are difficult times to be married and live the American dream—of owning your own home, of saving enough money to put your kids through college someday, of living in a decent neighborhood, of having a meaningful and happy marriage, et cetera. As I once heard, "Life is what happens to you while you're making big plans." Most people place their marriage at the bottom of their list of priorities. Your marriage should come first, friends and family down on the list. By the way, church should come down on the list too. Nothing should be any higher on your list of priorities than your spouse. Only God comes higher, and God wants you to love each other above all else. If you don't, then nothing else really matters.

If you love your spouse, then you'll put up with him or her.

If you love your spouse, then you'll put up with him or her.

If you love your spouse, then you'll put up with him or her.

If you love your spouse, then you'll put up with him or her.

If you love your spouse, then you'll put up with him or her.

It's really as simple as that. If you love someone, then you'll put up with them just as God puts up with us!

People don't "fall" into sin. We choose to go into sin. We choose to hold onto our sinful pride. People choose not to love their spouse anymore with God's unconditional love. People choose to divorce. I always marvel that a couple can get married in a boat, on a mountain, in a church, under water, on a rollercoaster, in a park, or even at the south pole; BUT, you can only be divorced IN A COURT OF LAW!

There's no such thing as the saying, "We used to love each other." The Bible clearly teaches that "charity (love) never faileth" (1st Corinthians 13:8). Either you loved your spouse then and still do now, or else you don't love your spouse now and never did at all. True love is NOT conditional; but rather, unconditional. You hang in there and be strong while your spouse is weak, for that is what God does for us.

God Hates Divorce!

You know, why is it that many people who want a divorce go around quoting Jesus' statement on adultery; but I never hear these people quote Malachi 2:16 where God say he HATES divorce, "For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away." "Putting away" is the Old Testament term used for divorce, which is an interesting phrase. The term "putting away" comes from the Hebrew word shalach, and literally means "to forsake, to cast or push away." When you divorce your spouse, you are literally shoving them away from you, forsaking them, and God HATES IT.

I heard a divorced woman quote Malachi 2:14 concerning husbands who deal "treacherously" with their wives; but the context of the Scripture passage is strictly divorce. That is, a husband who divorces his wife is dealing treacherously with her, especially if they've been married for a long time. God HATES divorce! Why don't I ever heard women quoting Jeremiah 3:20... "Surely as a wife treacherously departeth from her husband, so have ye dealt treacherously with me, O house of Israel, saith the LORD." It is divorce that is treacherous.

Who's to Blame?

Please understand that I don't condemn anyone, for the Bible condemns all of us as guilty, dirty, rotten, hell-deserving sinners. My salvation solely rests in Christ's righteousness, because of the precious blood that He gave for our sins. My intention is not to be unkind; but rather, to expose the sin of divorce. If you have divorced, I certainly don't condemn you, for we are all sinners in God's eyes. The intent of my article is to prevent divorce, not to make people feel bad who have already made that mistake in their life. Any sin is forgivable through faith in Jesus Christ (Acts 10:43).

I realize that in some situations, a spouse may run off with someone else in adultery. The abandoned spouse is often helpless to recover their former mate. I did not write this article to condemn anyone, especially not the victim of a divorce. A gentlemen recently wrote me, saying that his wife had run off with another man and remarried. So tragic! The man was obviously very sad. In such a situation, even though the husband may have contributed to his wife's decision to leave; he is NOT guilty of committing divorce (as he did not file or agree to the divorce). When a couple promises to stay with each another "for better, for worse; 'til death do us part," that is what God expects.

If you are the victim of a divorce (i.e., your spouse abandoned you), then you have my deepest sympathies. Don't let people use your past to discourage you. Those hypocrites who go digging and searching for other people's sins are evil, rotten and malicious. I realize that all the sympathy in the world won't make anything better; but, Jesus Christ can make things better if you'll lose yourself in the Lord's work of soulwinning.

I cannot tell you what to do, for only you can make the decisions that guide your life; BUT if your spouse has left you and is not remarried yet, I would suggest that you call her/him and attempt to make things right. I would also suggest that you ask your pastor if he'll go with you to visit your spouse. Only sinful pride causes divorce. There have been many instances of divorced couples actually getting remarried. I realize that there are many different situations, and everyone feels that they are the victim in a divorce; but, God knows everyone's heart and WILL judge the guilty. I simply wrote this article in hopes of possibly saving a few marriages. You don't have to divorce your spouse! Divorce is a personal choice that no one MAKES you do.

It is NEVER right for you to leave and then remarry (because you are the guilty party for leaving). Whoever FILES for divorce is the guilty party (as far as the divorce itself). If a spouse was abusive, leading to a divorce; then God will judge that person for their abusive words and actions; BUT, that certainly does NOT justify a divorce!!! God KNOWS your every thought and intention, so no matter how much you attempt to rationalize and lie to yourself, God WILL hold you fully accountable for your words and actions on judgment day (Matthew 12:37).

I'm simply saying that there are two sides to every story, and then there's the TRUTH—and God will judge each divorced couple according to the TRUTH; and not according their own side of the story. It is clearly adultery for any married person to run off and marry another. If you are truly a victim, then God knows your situation and I believe you are free to remarry.


America is in the mess it's in today because of lukewarm preachers who no longer preach against sin! Carefully notice that 1st Corinthians 5:1 reads, "It is reported commonly that there is fornication among you..." You see, sin had spread into the church, and was growing like a weed. Paul wasn't looking and searching for anyone's sins, he had simply heard about it. Sadly, divorce is reported commonly in America's churches today.

In closing, divorce is a sin and should never be considered an option in any marriage. The divorce rate in America is skyrocketing because of sinful pride. It is the same sinful pride that fuels abortion, murder, homosexuality, witchcraft, gambling, pornography, and every other sin imaginable. As believers, let us follow in the steps of our wonderful Savior, Who promised that He would NEVER leave us, nor forsake us in Hebrews 13:5.

"...Let not the wife depart from her husband... and let not the husband put away his wife." —1st Corinthians 7:10,11
Brilliant way to put it Ronnie. I appreciate. Thank you.
Forgive me MsMS and Bro. John if I would say this that I would not agree that "one isn't obligated to stay in the marriage". As far as I know and recall, marriage is a binding covenant (meaning, a solemn, and legally binding agreement), between you (the couple) and God.

In the first place, why would God reminded us through His words in the Bible of so many things that we have to remember about marriage if ,I may quote again, "one isn't obligated to stay in marriage"?
hi ronnie my first friend in AO!
I repeat here! sorry about!my history.
my first wife suddenly start some lesbian behaviour and I not need details to explain what come after this!
the second one was fine,but she start become crazy by sex!its ok!so,when she had one spiritual crise,she start to going after men,and nothing couldnt stop her!I accepted this almost 3 years,but later she got divorce,and now she is marriaged again!you remember that I told here this!
what can I do?
I am looking for a new one,not hurry ,but I need someone!
peace
tony
The Lord has permitted things that He does not like. Divorce is one of these. He hates divorce. He would rather that we not divorce for ANY reason. He would rather we leave open to door to reconciliation. But, he does allow for divorce under some circumstances.
Yes Gabriel! divorce! but not to her again until the widow or his former partner to take the initiative before you! both need to be im peace without her again! taking the initiative to get married, is missing, and give freedom to the ex-partner in front of God to marry again!
after the divorce without adultery, whom to marry first, lost forever and never his right as a member's chance to marry another, and still awaiting trial divine! men, he or she is disapproved forever!
its clear?
Feel free to ask!
peace
tony
I can't recall the texts atm (pardon me, it's late and I should be asleep).... but to look at another woman (with lust) is to commit adultery. It's not about the physical act but the MENTAL act, first...
SO, my point, yes lol. If you have a husband/wife who likes to look at porn, does this count as adultery? Does this FREE us from the marriage?
Read the story of Gomer.
Hosea 1:1 The word of the LORD that came unto Hosea, the son of Beeri, in the days of Uzziah, Jotham, Ahaz, and Hezekiah, kings of Judah, and in the days of Jeroboam the son of Joash, king of Israel.
1:2 The beginning of the word of the LORD by Hosea. And the LORD said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee a wife of whoredoms and children of whoredoms: for the land hath committed great whoredom, departing from the LORD.
1:3 So he went and took Gomer the daughter of Diblaim; which conceived, and bare him a son.

Continue reading the book of Hosea.

It is talking about the church.

Also there are principle of life to follow in those text.

My wife and I talked about that for a while, while in our youth in Christ.

If I was to divorce her, I would not marry as long as she is still alive, and vise versa.

But that's me! It is all about your relationship with God.

Jesus said: "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery:and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery."
the ladies all time had did this thing to accept unfaithful husband recidivist,again again and again,but the guys neve r accept any mistakes!why,why,why????????????????????we are equal in front the heavenly witness!
peace
Bro. John, by this words alone "let not man put asunder", meaning it's God's words not of man. In other words, the very moment we sway from that word, it is something we go against with.

I just don't know how we are going to define God's commandment and how we hold on and abide to it. Is there any such thing (referring to God's word) that is not permissible to God that is acceptable to men?

P.S. Please read the following post so that you will understand or have a better appeciation what Matthew 19:6 tries to convey?
Well, I respect you opinion Bro. John. I would appreciate if you can give some time reading the post (lengthy post) so that you will know what I am talking all these times. I don't have to re-copy and re-paste the first reply I have posted here. Your clarification, I think, would answer to your doubts. Thanks. God bless.
I appreciate you being a smart person as you are. Your posts have manifested it. Conversely, let me share with you the message of a song, which I personally believe it is true, that "the road to heaven is not easy". In other words, you will still undergo trials (in various ways) to test your patience that would help you become a mature chistian and child of God while you are still waiting for His soon return. This is to prepare His child for that heavenly kingdom He promised to everyone who believes in Him.

In other words, we cannot just make a complicated test or situation into simple one the way we wanted it to be. I understand that because of the comfort of life and the help of the advanced technology, we wanted quick or immediate responses to everything we believe can be done and will be given immediate simple solution that bests suit our criteria.

Remember, Jesus did victoriously won His fight to save us from the bondage of sin. He was tempted many times by evil yet He was able to endure even if how long it is. This is to leave a set an example for us who are looking up to Him.

Going back to the main point, it is good to read long posts when especially it carries a message that would help us grow as Christian.

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