Adventist Online


I have a friend that is not a Seventh Day Adventist, he's an Open Bible should i go out with him. And by extension what is being unequally yoked.  Please someone answer me i need HELP.


Views: 1538

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Well said, Vlythe!  There are many things that people can have in common without compromise of standards or principles.  Joesph, Esther, Daniel, and others in scripture were able to stand in the midst of their environments and people of other countries without being offensive to them--and were respected.  Christians are to do the same in their respective neighborhoods, communities, and even at work.  Personal relationships should be no different.



Dear Pr Ray,


I valued your opinion very highly,  I never thought of all those points yet they are extremely valid.

Since I have had three divorces and a mulitude of relationships prior to attaining the wise age of 44, I wish you had been a friend years ago.

If you go on any dating site you will fill in a compatibility questionairre which shows that people need to be compatible.  The Great God of the Universe knew this when he made a man and a woman to be together and yet at the same time told us not to be unequally yoked....

I know by experience that even being raised in different areas of Melbourne can provide incompaibility.

ie: the other sides of Melbourne are generally a environment of poverty and struggle and this side is more prosperous,.... this breeds different mind sets and once the romance begins to settle into ordinary life, as it eventually does and the rose coloured glasses come off and the fireworks have abated somewhat, the mind must be compatible.

You can have people who are like concrete - all mixed up and thoroughly set.  No matter what you do to woe them or love them, you can't change a mind already forged.

I have read that the reason why God cannot replace a single soul is because he made us and then every single one of our choices forges a mind that cannot be duplicated.  Our choices frame us and the mind cannot be changed unless there is divine intervention. 

If you find a person and they "do it for you or light your fire" in some way, eventually the fire dies down.  The mind, the habits, the upbringing, the parenting, the choices all mold the man/woman and that needs to be closely investigated as that will not change.  It will not change.  It will not change.  Trust me, most women think they can take a man and change him with their love.  Not so.  Love softens but does not change the heart, only the love of God can do that.  Christ says, I, if I be lifted up will draw all men unto me...he is the only one with the power to change thru his love.  There are women who fall for criminals in prison hoping to change them by their love... the power of heredity and the power of choice and the power of the mind all framed, the power of upbringing and the mindset are a strong enough power that Christ himself had tocome to die to change mens minds.

Does it not say in Proverbs, as the Mother so the daughter and as the Father so the son.  Therefore God gives us wisdom to look into the family situation as well.  Check out how the father treats his wife, because his son will follow in his footsteps unto the 3rd and 4th generation, whether we like it or not and how does his Mother deal with him, does she spoil him, he will expect you to do the same....these things are usually overlooked, and yet, the overlooking causes such pain and suffering.  Would God that we all  had the wisdom to follow Rays advice and put principle above policy.


Thank you Ray and to Arlena with the beautiful smile and willingness and wisdom to ask for guidance, may you be spared much suffering by listening carefully to Ray, as I should have done many years and many times.

Kindly, Dee


Site Sponsors


Adventist Single?
Meet other Single
Adventists here:
Join Free

USA members:

Support AO by
using this link:


© 2019   Created by Clark P.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service