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Why do marriages fail. Please state what you think.

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sorry for the misunderstanding 

I meant what is your purpose here ?

Apparently you didn't ready Jason. So once again i will re-write for your understanding. Please refer to my previous forum titled "PURPOSE" and you will see my Purpose here and anywhere else.


As for being here on Adventist Online, is the same Purpose here on this earth. Which (once again) if you refer to the Forum "Purpose" you will see

The definition or reason given is a bit vague 

what about these texts, is this  part of our purpose ?

And he said to them, “Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned  Mark 16:15, 16 

Ephesians 3:8-12

New King James Version (NKJV)

Purpose of the Mystery

To me, who am less than the least of all the saints, this grace was given, that I should preach among the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ, and to make all see what is the fellowship of the mystery, which from the beginning of the ages has been hidden in God who created all things through Jesus Christ10 to the intent that now the manifold wisdom of God might be made known by the church to the principalities and powers in the heavenly places, 11 according to the eternal purpose which He accomplished in Christ Jesus our Lord, 12 in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through faith in Him.

And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel, Ephesians 6:19

But of the Son He says, "YOUR THRONE, O GOD, IS FOREVER AND EVER, AND THE RIGHTEOUS SCEPTER IS THE SCEPTER OF HIS KINGDOM. 9. YOU HAVE LOVED RIGHTEOUSNESS AND HATED LAWLESSNESS; THEREFORE GOD, YOUR GOD, HAS ANOINTED YOU WITH THE OIL OF GLADNESS ABOVE YOUR COMPANIONS." Hebrews.  1:8,9 

how will we escape if we neglect so great a salvation? After it was at the first spoken through the Lord, it was confirmed to us by those who heard Hebrews 2:3 

 LOVE MY FRIENDS IS NOT BASED ON HOW U FEEL OK? Once u make that commitment To marry someone and the ( Feeling ) EPHORIA  OR HIGH SENSATION  is not their  anymore do u then choose to not respect or honor your mate ? YES many will do just that they start to pull away emotionally from the one they made a covenant with before God And friends intentionally or unintentionally at first  and it is all about SELF OK?  

 Unforgiveness for some act the other person did that was so horrifying to them they wont let go of it ( well sort of .) Imean to say some will not end their marriage  but they wont give anything to it either , The ywill use their mate for financial  assistance because today it so hard to go it alone  but they will either sleep in another  room or not show their spouse love that The LORD  Himself has said in His word is their  obligation OR Both of the above and still expect God to bless them in their life .,

Has God   not shown mercy and forgiveness to u thousands of times  in  Just  a short time of space but have u done the same to a mate that is imperfect as you are ?  How many marriages are failing for a lack of forgiveness and hardness of heart and yet  they Go t o church each week and give their offerings and give of tithes too but their is this sore spot in their heart against their mate they refuse to let go of ? This is a true story  ok Just a little bit changed caus e  I cant remember the exacrt details  a husband and wife  were on the highway and a police officer pulls them over and sees  their is something wrong He the nsays Lady whatever your husband has done that has hurt you forgive him  AND  gets back in his car  AND DRIVES OFF

Is not forgiveness much easier to give the nto hold this anger inside your heart?  . 

 IN Sis  WHITES   writings and I not sure just where it is at at this moment in time ( so if u can assist in this  feel free to do so } she does state that  MARRIAGE  prepares u for  Heaven if u  refuse to work in it  it will be very hard for you to make it in the kingdom if not impossible ? .

 Is not  deliberatly refusing to give your mate true respect and honor  a sin that the  Satan Himself devised and if u continue to listen to this voice and refuse any council of what hope is left then ? ARE you going t o wait until you Feel like showing your mate love and respect before  you obey  the instructions God gives in the Bible? If this is your mind set and hoping someday t o find another more pleasing your believing a lie  and this strong  delusion  will be to your ruin .

 NUFF SED!

Tender Ties That Bind—The family tie is the closest, the most tender and sacred, of any on earth. It was designed to be a blessing to mankind. And it is a blessing wherever the marriage covenant is entered into intelligently, in the fear of God, and with due consideration for its responsibilities.15 {AH 18.5}

Christ honored the marriage relation by making it also a symbol of the union between Him and His redeemed ones. He Himself is the Bridegroom; the bride is the church, of which, as His chosen one, He says, “Thou art all fair, My love; there is no spot in thee.”4 {AH 26.2}

A Happy or Unhappy Marriage?—If those who are contemplating marriage would not have miserable, unhappy reflections after marriage, they must make it a subject of serious, earnest reflection now. This step taken unwisely is one of the most effective means of ruining the usefulness of young men and women. Life becomes a burden, a curse. No one can so effectually ruin a woman’s happiness and usefulness, and make life a heartsickening burden, as her own husband; and no one can do one hundredth part as much to chill the hopes and aspirations of a man, to paralyze his energies and ruin his influence and prospects, as his own wife. It is from the marriage hour that many men and women date their success or failure in this life, and their hopes of the future life.1 {AH 43.1}

 THANK U  IAN   for assisting  that was wel lsaid. listen up people it is not  to be said of any of us reading this we refuse to listen to wisdom in this Marriage aspect. Marriage is to be a blessing and it requires us to work together  showing truly respect and honor for our mate . . Let me just add this if  one refuses to show love physically as well as emotionally you are slowly killing your  mate just as much as if u took a knife or gun and killed them outright and u wont escape the judgement by saying I( DID NOT KNOW ).

  Ladies do u know your father  could be the blame in part for being harsh towards u while u were growing up and by not showing  love that is seen to your mom also? I can not emphasize enough the benefits u will recieve by listening to the audio books or even reading the  book the(  5 Love languages by  DR  GARY CHAPMAN and their is sooo much u can learn from another book of his too the LANGUAGE OF APOLOGY .I implore u please  get these books or audio tapes for they be  exceleent  and the only way u wont learn something is by refusing to co-operate,

Your parents regardles of how much they claimed to Love  God are just imperfect  beings and they too made mistakes and it is up to us to reconize  our short comings . If we are lacking in the abilty to give love back please do not enter into the marriage relationship thinking you will change later get the help u need now by asking and accepting Gods healing from council and then start to apply it.

i'll be posting a video soon. Look out for it. That will explain  your assumption. 

As Jesus has done for us, Christian likeways should share love not always wainting for it. We have to behave humbly in any situations in live wether it's hard to do it.
Marriage is a symbol of the life of Jesus, empty of love. Each couple should have the same attitude and make their home as a heaven. By the grace and a lot of effort we can do miracles.
I share the point of the others' views that you need to find some ways to keep the love alive by reading the bible and some books about love.

1. Women have wrongly interpreted the issue of equal rights to mean that they must not submit to their husbands. As a result husbands no longer have love for their wives which increases infidelity.

2. The devil is heavily attacking the institution of marriage knowing that by so doing he will weaken the church.

 I  do not want to place the blame on any one party , lets see if  you know your marriage is  not as it should be what in your mind should be the first responce ? Would it be safe to ask questions first to yourself  and then to your mate as to what is needed? Suppose  your  a Adventist since u were born raised in a traditional family setting evening and morning worship is  a tradition may I  ask if it is just a routine that is brought up but it lacks purpose then ?

 What am I getting at then ?? Hear me out please! remember before Jesus was born the priests labored every day waiting for the coming of the  Special Child of P ROMISE> When he came it was buisness as ususal and only Anna and Simeon aged and well versed reconized this child!! Can our worship day and evening then be out of routine ,formalisim, lack of or unwillingness to  not just read the word of God but also a willingness a eagerness to follow after what has been read and sung saying am I doing my best ?

   I am not a person that wants to place  blame on a person alone  for a marriage should be about the needs of both in this sacred setting yes??  I know I am impefect and have made soooo many stupid mistakes too and I know God is all about mercy and grace too so I say to myself if God is so loving and patient with my mistakes and attitude  I have to be willing to show grace pardon ,mercy also .

 Being a Person that  loves others I HAVE seen  a lot of heartache and  I  have listened to soo many others that tell me of tragic instances in their relationships both men and women, .I  know we are supposed to be willing to be humble and ask for help when things just cant be resolved by our efforts.. I ALSO know  that many are too proud to go to council and if their is a problem with your marriage  you need to not only ask for help but also be willing to follow the iinstructions u recieve yes or no? . persay Ulove your mate but  yes you ge tangry because  your mate does not respond to most anything u ask and basically does nothing for u  because of some unresolved conflict that gets pushed back and never dealt with is their going to be healing then ??

 Am I being over meldramatic here ? Is what I am talking about not ever happening in todays world then ? I see in this so much that never gets addressed  and when someone talks the points the y bring out again are passed over and dismissed ?   LETS  get real here  Sin is in each one of us and sinful habbits if not addressed and corrected will destroy us Ido not care if u have DAY WORSHIP  and evening worship and go to all the church services u can go if u have hatred in your heart anger issuses against your mate   all your sacrifices are as if you are doing nothing at all for it is just in vain a ritual no love is their at all-. If u want happiness  you have to be  willing to also  see what your mates needs are and sdacrifice for them  It is not just about what you  EXPECT AND WANT -/ NUFF SED!

PERSAY THE  Person u Love and adore married u  not out of love or devotion?  PERSAY they had a differnt agenda and soon after u married they stop all intamicies ?    Has this not taken place in our church espeially today when their those that find  their Love in a room similar to this one ? I see many that are looking for a serious and loving companion and their is Nothing wrong with that concept either.

,MAY i ask if online  you have to tell the truth that you cant be anyone u want others to think u are ? Hear me out just for a minute ok?  I wont bend your ear again on this topic  for I guess their so few  that wants to hear a perspective other veiw point that is actually   A valid point. .Persay  as  I mentioned  that certain someone  U marry was real sweet and loving all the   while u talked and   courted online  and u actually think  their a saint  U court say all the right things ( well sort of for many times infatuation blocks out reasoning I hear from family ministries) and U say to yourself this person, is not perfect I know this but as we get to know one another better in time they will grow to love me more Later,  has this not happened in todays fast paced society?

 I would not know just How to give council to something like that except to say be real careful  beforehand but if U have such a  cituation U have to wait it out it seems .Some find out before marriage their intended lacks  sincere love and integrity and are hurt very badly emotionally and sometimes finacially  but It is 100 times worse once the  ( I DO,S  ARE SAID), Young people in the Lord  be careful Is my words of caution for not all are what they claim to be  that why You need to not only listen attentaively to what they say but also what they do not say too ok?

 If u have any doubts that arise in your heart n mind about a person I think personally U are far better off to wait  and Pray alot longer before making any quick decisions about marriage . Selah But then again who  am I  That you should listen to my words ?

Well said Uncle. Judy you have not told us the real reason why marriages fail.

Can you explain the 'the reason and purpose' theory?

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