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I see a lot of divorce and separation status ...
What is the reason all this happened?
I believe that God does not allow divorce case.
But there may be some reason this all happened ...

First of all, no matter what view one takes on the issue of divorce, it is important to remember Malachi 2:16: “I hate divorce, says the LORD God of Israel.” According to the Bible, marriage is a lifetime commitment. “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:6). God realizes, though, that since marriages involve two sinful human beings, divorces are going to occur. In the Old Testament, He laid down some laws in order to protect the rights of divorcees, especially women (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Jesus pointed out that these laws were given because of the hardness of people’s hearts, not because they were God’s desire (Matthew 19:8).

God Bless 

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Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, that He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things–that she might be holy and faultless. Even so husbands should love their wives as (being in a sense) their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and carefully protects and cherishes it, as Christ does the church. Because we are members (parts) of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is very great, but I speak concerning (the relation of) Christ and the church. However, let each man of you (without exception) love his wife (being in a sense) his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband–that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him and loves and admires him exceedingly. Ephesians 5: 25-33

 I AM SORRY to see so little responce t this Post.  Maybe it because this topic is something I have t odeal with personally and the  Yes Pain it causes is fresh.. Their so much divorce and  sepperation for the reason that  the Hearts of so many today even in the  church Have gone COLD.. They think Marriage is all about self and their  (  Happiness ) alone. 

 Yes marriage was designed by God to have us  Happy but happiness that is lasting does not mean it all about self..True happiness IS  patient with others mistakes  . You do not want to think about just what it is that makes me happy perspnally it is also about serving your mate  n being pleasing t them..  

 When u look beyond just your own  wants and be a blessing to not just your mate but reach out n be a friend towards others sincerly  wanting to be their friend it brings about a chnage  that is  seen not just in your own heart n mind but in those around u also//

 Listen up  Happiness is something we share and  u know  your imperfect   for the Bible teels us this and  would u not want someoe u love and care for overlook your mistakes ?  Why is it then when they make a choice that not right  u have to be so hard on them and sooooo many in their actions show no Grace or compassion ?  

 Ihave a friend that married a much younger woman   she is a corrections officer   that makes alot of money  well  anyway in the world we live in women tend t  spend before the y think it out clearly the bills the y will have to pay for or keep paying for Later to satisfy their want of today.// .He told me though  u  discuss things openly together and when u agreed on something and  your mate  forgets to  remember ha !!  U do not shout at them  u just have to remind them  of your agreement   and that it  has to be stuck too and do your best to keep a budget u can afford each month  for money problems do the most damage to marriages in the world we live in  Now..

 He told me this that when u lie down in bed together all the disagreements u have had should be laid t o rest n not brought up and    although He and his wife are not Christians this principle  they  try their best to keep and little things that bug u  are not  umm pondered on to the  degree it interfears with your  relationship/.. 

WHY is it then CHRISTIANS today   think Happinesss is just their own feelings and  cant or wont compromise to keep their home  happy?  WHY wont sooo many  make Christ their true Love  and when their wife or husband  do someting or say something th twrong bring it to their attention in a loving manner ? ..  If u angry at them   allow time to kool down before confronting them  and Pray and I mean   Pray which means Listen also not just telling God what u want ok?/ .

 DO not call your spouse  by anything other than what that is pleasing for them to hear..  BE  always willing t o accept  critisim that be helpful or  maybe even something that u doing  tha t is wrong  that  u should  change to be more pleasing for  the one u married ? . Have time  t o discuss issues of importance to u and for him to discuss things with u  and that the ybe not at bed time when your tired n can not always think as clear as needed ok? / 

BE able to disagree  BUT  not be disagreeable when doing so..  Women are sensitive about the ir appearance so men when your wife is  gaining a bit of weight do not be  remarking on theis negatively by calling her fat. . Men suprize your wife with little gifts they need not be extravegent ..   Flowers or just  one . If   U HAE CHILDREN  time alone with  just u and her is also a gifyt ,, hire a baby siitter or have  a friend if u cant afford one to ook after them  for u for a few hours time so u 2 an be alone  and have time to be together . 


Ditto uncle Murray

This is what our church manual says about this topic based on scripture:

Effects of the Fall on Marriage -The entrance of sin adversely affected marriage. When Adam and Eve sinned, they lost the oneness which they had known with God and with one another (Gen. 3:6-24). Their relationship became marked with guilt, shame, blame, and pain. Wherever sin reigns, its sad effects on marriage include alienation, desertion, unfaithfulness, neglect, abuse, violence, separation, divorce, domination of one partner by the other, and sexual perversion. Marriages involving more than one spouse are also an expression of the effects of sin on the institution of marriage. Such marriages, although practiced in Old Testament times, are not in harmony with the divine design. God's plan for marriage requires His people to transcend the mores of popular culture which are in conflict with the biblical view.
Restoration and Healing
Divine Ideal to Be Restored in Christ -In redeeming the world from sin and its consequences, God also seeks to restore marriage to its original ideal. This is envisioned for the lives of those who have been born again into the kingdom of Christ, those whose hearts are being sanctified by the Holy Spirit and who have as their primary purpose in life the exaltation of the Lord Jesus Christ. (See also 1 Peter 3:7; Thoughts From the Mount of Blessing , p. 64.)

Oneness and Equality to Be Restored in Christ -The gospel emphasizes the love and submission of husband and wife to one another (1 Cor. 7:3, 4; Eph. 5:21). The model for the husband's leadership is the self-sacrificial love and service that Christ gives to the church (Eph. 5:24, 25). Both Peter and Paul speak about the need for respect in the marriage relationship (1 Peter 3:7; Eph. 5:22, 23).

Grace Available for All -God seeks to restore to wholeness and reconcile to Himself all who have failed to attain the divine standard (2 Cor. 5:19). This includes those who have experienced broken marriage relationships.

Role of the Church -Moses in the Old Testament and Paul in the New Testament dealt with the problems caused by broken marriages (Deut. 24:1-5; 1 Cor. 7:11). Both, while upholding and affirming the ideal, worked constructively and redemptively with those who had fallen short of the divine standard. Similarly, the church today is called to uphold and affirm God's ideal for marriage and, at the same time, to be a reconciling, forgiving, healing community, showing understanding and compassion when brokenness occurs.
Biblical Teachings on Divorce
God's Original Purpose -Divorce is contrary to God's original purpose in creating marriage (Matt. 19:3-8; Mark 10:2-9), but the Bible is not silent about it. Because divorce occurred as part of the fallen human experience, biblical legislation was given to limit the damage it caused (Deut. 24:1-4). The Bible consistently seeks to elevate marriage and to discourage divorce by describing the joys of married love and faithfulness (Prov. 5:18-20; Song of Sol. 2:16; 4:9-5:1), by referring to the marriage-like relationship of God with His people (Isa. 54:5; Jer. 3:1), by focusing on the possibilities of forgiveness and marital renewal (Hosea 3:1-3), and by indicating God's abhorrence of divorce and the misery it causes (Mal. 2:15, 16). Jesus restored the creation view of marriage as a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman and between the couple and God (Matt. 19:4-6; Mark 10:6-9). Much biblical instruction affirms marriage and seeks to correct problems which tend to weaken or destroy the foundation of marriage (Eph. 5:21-33; Heb. 13:4; 1 Peter 3:7).
Marriages Can Be Destroyed -Marriage rests on principles of love, loyalty, exclusiveness, trust, and support upheld by both partners in obedience to God (Gen. 2:24; Matt. 19:6; 1 Cor. 13; Eph. 5:21-29; 1 Thess. 4:1-7). When these principles are violated, the marriage is endangered. Scripture acknowledges that tragic circumstances can destroy marriage.
Divine Grace -Divine grace is the only remedy for the brokenness of divorce. When marriage fails, former partners should be encouraged to examine their experience and to seek God's will for their lives. God provides comfort to those who have been wounded. God also accepts the repentance of individuals who commit the most destructive sins, even those that carry with them irreparable consequences (2 Sam. 11; 12; Ps. 34:18; 86:5; Joel 2:12, 13; John 8:2-11; 1 John 1:9).
Grounds for Divorce -Scripture recognizes adultery and/or fornication (Matt. 5:32) as well as abandonment by an unbelieving partner (1 Cor. 7:10-15) as grounds for divorce.
Biblical Teachings on Remarriage
There is no direct teaching in Scripture regarding remarriage after divorce. However, there is a strong implication in Jesus' words in Matthew 19:9 that would allow the remarriage of one who has remained faithful, but whose spouse has been unfaithful to the marriage vow.
Church's Position on Divorce and Remarriage
Acknowledging the teachings of the Bible on marriage, the church is aware that marriage relationships are less than ideal in many cases. The problem of divorce and remarriage can be seen in its true light only as it is viewed from Heaven's viewpoint and against the background of the Garden of Eden. Central to God's holy plan for our world was the creation of beings made in His image who would multiply and replenish the earth and live together in purity, harmony, and happiness. He brought forth Eve from the side of Adam and gave her to Adam as his wife. Thus was marriage instituted-God the author of the institution, God the officiator at the first marriage. After the Lord had revealed to Adam that Eve was verily bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh, there could never arise a doubt in his mind that they twain were one flesh. Nor could ever a doubt arise in the mind of either of the holy pair that God intended that their home should endure forever.
The church adheres to this view of marriage and home without reservation, believing that any lowering of this high view is to that extent a lowering of the heavenly ideal. The belief that marriage is a divine institution rests upon the Holy Scriptures. Accordingly, all thinking and reasoning in the perplexing field of divorce and remarriage must constantly be harmonized with that holy ideal revealed in Eden.
The church believes in the law of God; it also believes in the forgiving mercy of God. It believes that victory and salvation can as surely be found by those who have transgressed in the matter of divorce and remarriage as by those who have failed in any other of God's holy standards. Nothing presented here is intended to minimize the mercy of God or the forgiveness of God. In the fear of the Lord, the church here sets forth the principles and practices that should apply in this matter of marriage, divorce, and remarriage.
Though marriage was first performed by God alone, it is recognized that people now live under civil governments on this earth; therefore, marriage has both a divine and a civil aspect. The divine aspect is governed by the laws of God, the civil by the laws of the state.
In harmony with these teachings, the following statements set forth the position of the Seventh-day Adventist Church:
When Jesus said, "Let not man put asunder," He established a rule of conduct for the church under the dispensation of grace which must transcend all civil enactments which would go beyond His interpretation of the divine law governing the marriage relation. Here He gives a rule to His followers who should adhere to it whether or not the state or prevailing custom allows larger liberty. "In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus declared plainly that there could be no dissolution of the marriage tie, except for unfaithfulness to the marriage vow."- Thoughts From the Mount of Blessing , p. 63. (Matt. 5:32; 19:9.)

Unfaithfulness to the marriage vow has generally been seen to mean adultery and/or fornication. However, the New Testament word for fornication includes certain other sexual irregularities. (1 Cor. 6:9; 1 Tim. 1:9, 10; Rom. 1:24-27.) Therefore, sexual perversions, including incest, child sexual abuse, and homosexual practices, are also recognized as a misuse of sexual powers and a violation of the divine intention in marriage. As such they are just cause for separation or divorce.

Even though the Scriptures allow divorce for the reasons mentioned above, as well as for abandonment by an unbelieving spouse (1 Cor. 7:10-15), earnest endeavors should be made by the church and those concerned to effect a reconciliation, urging the spouses to manifest toward each other a Christ-like spirit of forgiveness and restoration. The church is urged to relate lovingly and redemptively toward the couple in order to assist in the reconciliation process.

In the event that reconciliation is not effected, the spouse who has remained faithful to the spouse who violated the marriage vow has the biblical right to secure a divorce and also to remarry.

A spouse who has violated the marriage vow (see sections 1 and 2 above) shall be subject to discipline by the local church. (See pp.193-200.) If genuinely repentant, the spouse may be placed under censure for a stated period of time rather than removed from church membership. A spouse who gives no evidence of full and sincere repentance, shall be removed from church membership. In case the violation has brought public reproach on the cause of God, the church, in order to maintain its high standards and good name, may remove the individual from church membership even though there is evidence of repentance.

Any of these forms of discipline shall be applied by the local church in a manner that would seek to attain the two objectives of church discipline-to correct and redeem. In the gospel of Christ, the redemptive side of discipline is always tied to an authentic transformation of the sinner into a new creature in Jesus Christ.

A spouse who has violated the marriage vow and who is divorced does not have the moral right to marry another while the spouse who has been faithful to the marriage vow still lives and remains unmarried and chaste. The person who does so shall be removed from church membership. The person whom he/she marries, if a member, shall also be removed from church membership.

It is recognized that sometimes marriage relations deteriorate to the point where it is better for a husband and wife to separate. "To the married I give charge, not I but the Lord, that the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, let her remain single or else be reconciled to her husband)-and that the husband should not divorce his wife" (1 Cor. 7:10, 11, RSV). In many such cases the custody of the children, the adjustment of property rights, or even personal protection may make necessary a change in marital status. In such cases it may be permissible to secure what is known in some countries as a legal separation. However, in some civil jurisdictions such a separation can be secured only by divorce.

A separation or divorce which results from factors such as physical violence or in which "unfaithfulness to the marriage vow" (see sections 1 and 2 above) is not involved, does not give either one the scriptural right to remarry, unless in the meantime the other party has remarried; committed adultery or fornication; or died. Should a member who has been thus divorced remarry without these biblical grounds, he/she shall be removed from church membership; and the one whom he/she marries, if a member, shall also be removed from church membership. (See pp. 194-196.)

A spouse who has violated the marriage vow and has been divorced and removed from church membership and who has remarried, or a person who has been divorced on other than the grounds set forth in sections 1 and 2 above and has remarried, and who has been removed from church membership, shall be considered ineligible for membership except as hereinafter provided.

The marriage contract is not only sacred but also infinitely more complex than ordinary contracts in its possible involvements; for example, with children. Hence, in a request for readmittance to church membership, the options available to the repentant may be severely limited. Before final action is taken by the local church, the request for readmittance shall be brought by the church through the pastor or district leader to the conference/mission/field committee for counsel and recommendation as to any possible steps that the repentant one, or ones, may take to secure such readmittance.

Readmittance to membership of those who have been removed from church membership for reasons given in the foregoing sections shall normally be on the basis of rebaptism. (See p. 199.)

When a person who has been removed from membership is readmitted to church membership, as provided in section 8., every care should be exercised to safeguard the unity and harmony of the church by not giving such a person responsibility as a leader; especially in an office which requires the rite of ordination, unless by very careful counsel with the conference/mission/field administration.

 Hence, in a request for readmittance to church membership, the options available to the repentant may be severely limited. Before final action is taken by the local church, the request for readmittance shall be brought by the church through the pastor or district leader to the conference/mission/field committee for counsel and recommendation as to any possible steps that the repentant one, or ones, may take to secure such readmittance.

How do they show repentance.?

Mark 10:11

11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.

To repent means to turn from their sin. Should they do like in Ezra 

Ezra 10:44

They all gave their hands in pledge to put away their wives, and for their guilt they each presented a ram from the flock as a guilt offering.

Are they supposed to put them away, kids and all return to their their first wife?

Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. 14 You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lordi s the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.

15 Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring.[d] So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth.

16 “The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, does violence to the one he should protect,”[e] says the Lord Almighty.

Here it says while they are divorced God does not hear their prayers "You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands."

So he have do violence against his second wife and send her and the kids away. Even he turn a new leaf and has an awesome family. 

Or have does have to keep both wives like the in Exodus . 

Exodus 21

 If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights.

He may never receive  ordination anyways. The church says,  to safeguard the unity and harmony of the church by not giving such a person responsibility as a leader; especially in an office which requires the rite of ordination

The bible says, 

1 Timothy 3

The bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior  given to hospitality, apt to teach;

The bible uses at he word for divorced "apostasion " In     1 Timothy 3    it uses "mia"  meaning first or one and the word " gynē " meaning woman . Most likely the meaning is one woman compared

to other verse when mia is used with a person. If it meants first woman  the church would correct.

The last option is the a remarried man shows repentance by living faithfully to the wife he has currently . Here is how    Timothy 3 is translated in the NIV  

 1Ti 3:2

Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach,
Here is what I think , if a man shows the qualities above  in his marriage even if it is his second ,he has shown signs of repentance. Please correct me if I am wrong. I may be wrong but as of now I 
I believe this.

 Why did Eve who know only happiness and joy eat the fruit of the tree of good and evil? Why  did a prefect angel fall? Why Christians keep on sinning after seeing the the death Jesus on the cross?    Why don't Christian love their enemies? Why so much lack of faith? The answer to these , is the same answer to your question?

so sad

all this divorce and remarriage- i have personally seen from believers in my lifetime-

is one of many reasons why The Church lost it's  authority to speak of Gay Marriages

(speak into gays lives)

The Sanctity of Marriage starts with your own marriage.

One Wife for Life and Love and Sacrifice for Her (mirror God's Love for the Church)

anything short of that creates many sins

God bless you all here

# Luke 6:42

How can you say to your brother, 'Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,' when you yourself fail to see the tree in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the tree out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

Hello Mary

I was reading this in James;

This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic. 16For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing. 17But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.…

The foundation of Marriage is based on selflessness which is our ability to put aside our own selfish needs and address the needs of others. Many people think of relationships as a method of personal fulfillment, rather than a chance to be fulfilling. They are waiting for another person to meet their needs, rather than seeking to serve. If we are daily fulfilled by Christ he will provide us with sufficient energy to meet the needs of others. When we look past Christ to other people to meet our Spiritual needs, we are going to be disappointed. People are flawed and cannot do for us what God can. When we first seek Christ and allow him to fulfill us, then he will provide us with what we need to serve our spouse.

Marriage is not easy for us sinners, but if Christ is at the center he will guide couples so that their bond will grow stronger over time. Many Christian Marriages fail because people are attached to religious traditions but not to living as Christ did. They are not truly fulfilled internally, and thus are unhappy with those around them. Instead of growing in patience, kindness, joy, peace, humility, love and self control, they become more dissatisfied with themselves and those around them. Thus, it gives them the opportunity to seek fulfillment in other people dishonoring their marriage. In the end if we seek Christ first and his Kingdom, our marriages will be an unbreakable bond.



Beautifully said Leon

Thanks Jason


God Bless Herbert...

It's very helpful.
It is true that sometimes the couple is looking more to the weakness of their partner than trying to solve.
Selfishness and lust that always grows in man.
We are all sinners and in a problematic situation of households, invite God and pray together.

Hopefully our households are built by God and not man himself.

Thanks all and God Bless...Happy Sabbath 

We learned in James  :[hopefully]   wisdom is not just knowledge it connects with our  conduct..  SO  what Good does the manual  for marriage in The SDA   CHURCH  do if it just disregarded to suit ones own purposes hmm?  Persay u marry in the  Church   n  yo u do so out of devotion and love  but the one u marry  finds fault with u continually and does not addres anything specifically? .  WE  are told not to Judge meaning harshly or presumptiously for we all err in some part of our  life yes? 

 You can say something that hurts your mate and not even know it .  WHY  is it then  if this happens and u keep it all locked up inside  would u expect  a marraige to survivve and that many today think they so rightous the y need not give their mate  Grace n forgiveness for their short comings ?

 WE living in a time where selfishness rules the hearts and yet the y also wont listen to reasonable council either and even refuse to be corrected. I seen it haappen when  Marriages disolve  over hardness of heart n the inability  of the other to forgive something  their mate said t o them. I think of the unjust steward  that was forgiven His  Large Debt  But  Refused to  show mercy n grace to someone that owed him but a little. 

 I have heard from many where over the internet they met a loved one and married thjem bringing them to their country only t o have them leave  a  short period of time later  and this goes to men as well as women...  Is it physical abuse alone that is faced ? Men can be  physically abusive  it true but do not todays women  in the church also  being  abusive  in a different kinda way ?,,   Does   2 wrongs  make it right  Then? .. 

  WHERE Does   Mercy and Grace come in at in a Marriage setting where the other is in error but by love and forgiveness that is seen in actions bring about change ?  I  just curious maybe if any of these othe abusive  behaviours have been addressed  ?  . Are we so easily seeing  abuse as in only  the men   and only Physical violence or maybe at  times verbal abuse but anything beyond that is tight lipped and does not exist?

 .  Any Ladies HAVE Anything to say  about this topic  feel free anyone else too.  If  this is to be adressed  FAIRLY then everything must come to the light just not  one  aspect hmm?  If the  Pastor of the church that  married u also tries to give council but it is refused   wha t stops  them from going to another state and  filing for divorce and re-marry ?? 

For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing. 17But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.…

Christians who marry often don't understand that at the core of love is unselfishness. They marry for reasons that seem noble, like companionship or to be loved. In our world romance is depicted as the pinnacle of fulfillment; where we can be truly valued. This is often leads to the cruel realization that people can only fulfill partially and no one can adequately meet our needs. These jaded realizations lead to dissatisfaction with ones partner and many seek to find fulfillment in other things and other people. Spouses become an hindrance; we realize they are flawed and begin to devalue them. Early compromise turns into a wrestle for control, money, affection, time and other resources serve as fuel for arguments. Instead of growing closer couples day by day fade apart, until the early love is replaced with animosity. Christians who should have started with Christ as the core of their existence and their primary source of fulfillment, now are frustrated because they are in a loveless marriage.

The solution is not that complicated. Return to Christ as your first love. Seek fulfillment in Him, once you are strengthened by his abiding love you will feel valued, accepted and fully loved. He will confirm you through service to him. You will learn to sacrifice for others, to give of your time and resources. He will teach you how to encourage, support, and care for others. These actions will confirm the immense value Christ has for you. Then instead of seeking service from your spouse, you will learn to serve and find joy in that action. This path is no guarantee for a bad marriage, because it does take two selfless people for success, but you will be on your way, and with God your path is guaranteed. With Christ at is core and service as your purpose, your relationships will bring the joy that accompanies your salvation.



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